Partial good news: the gaming community administrators in charge of reviewing the past month of controversies in our Guild Wars division have stated in a private message to me that all spouses in Guild Wars are completely free to play together whenever they wish, officers or not.
However, the new Division Captain has thus far obstinately ignored my request to edit his post to separate the real issue (member alienation) from the non-issue (spousal grouping).
By muddying the two together and not clearly separating one as acceptable and the other as not, many of us who play Guild Wars with our spouses felt insulted and slighted for someone else's perceived misconduct - which is why several of us quit the guild.
The true issue which was at the heart of the controversy was the fact that we guild members are not to refuse anyone admittance into any advertised (such as on Alliance Chat) grouping when there is room in the group.
I wholeheartedly agree with and even wrote up this rule when I was Division Captain (although it had been previously an understood rule; it had never been stated plainly).
As also established during my time as Division Captain (primarily established as a way to avert spats between players who did not get along with each other), selective groups are free to invite players privately.
This is how someone's toes got stepped on and a complaint was lodged about a privately formed group (even though it was not an advertised group).
Perhaps the accused parties got the new DC all confused with too much minutia and he reacted in frustration, not considering how both his words and his officers' openly posted opinions were affecting other married members of the division who were not party to the argument.
Nonetheless, the issues need to be clearly separated as one being right and the other being wrong - not somewhere inbetween - so that married members feel comfortable and accepted in the division. We married folk are a team deal.
Just think of us as a double-sized player. If one of us married people form a group, we usually start with two players right off the bat before we advertise or privately invite anyone else. If you invite one of us into a group, please have room for two.* And there ain't nothing wrong with that.
(*There are exceptions; one of us might choose to step out if the task at hand does not appeal or if we are busy with kids, or if we are just helping someone and our only available character would hinder the team build, etc. For example: DS and I vs. hard mode - there was a good solid three or four months that I did not play with him because he was playing hard mode and I detested it. After EoTN came out, we were suddenly back to playing together again and he left his hard mode buddies to play on their own. Then after DS and I beat EoTN, he went back to occasionally playing HM with his regular HM people - and I still decline to join.)
As for the status of my exile, I anxiously await the upcoming goal date of December 23, or an amendment to the post, whichever comes first.
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